Intimacy is a feeling of closeness between two or more individuals.
People often equate the word “intimacy” with physical closeness, such as sex.
However, they are not the same thing.
Illustration by Zoe Hansen for Verywell Health
Sexual intimacy happens when you combine the physical act of sex with emotional closeness.
There are many nonsexual types of intimacy within romantic and non-romantic relationships.
Illustration by Zoe Hansen for Verywell Health
Intimacy in Relationships: What Are the Five Different Types?
Experts typically define intimacy within the following five dimensions.
However, in romantic relationships, combining sex and intimacy can help create a stronger bond.
Intellectual Intimacy
Intellectual intimacy involves sharing knowledge, opinions, thoughts, ideas, and interests.
This might involve:
Experiential Intimacy
Experiential intimacy is about spending time together and experiencing common interests.
But, generally, it involves prioritizing the relationship, communicating, showing trust, and sharing quality time.
Enriching your communication can help you avoid misunderstandings and problem-solve more effectively.
For example, couples may communicate best during pillow talk in the morning or before sleep.
Parents and kids may find it natural to talk while driving home from school.
Quality time is also essential.
Others may want to turn off electronics and instead talk or take a walk together.
Do Something Fun or New Together
you could spark experiential intimacy by doing things together.
Ideally, activities should vary and occasionally include new adventures and scenery.
Sometimes planning and anticipation are part of intimacy building.
It can help you feel close as you prepare for the adventure and share the excitement.
Examples include:
Weekly rituals can provide anticipation for fun and provide a time to reconnect.
This might involve dancing in your living room, giving a back rub, hugging, or holding hands.
Additionally, it helps to work together as a team to get chores and errands done.
This can help you reserve energy and carve out time for sexual activities.
Benefits of Relationship Intimacy
Other types of intimate relationships can also provide social support.
Close friends and family also build each other up during hard times.
Sometimes people with mental health challenges or chronic pain can have a hard time caring for other people.
Some signs that intimacy may be reduced include:
Do Men and Women View Intimacy Differently?
Research indicates that women initiate and maintain intimacy with their partners more often than men.
Improving Intimacy: Support and Resources
The first step in improving intimacy is identifying the underlying problem.
It may help to reframe your thoughts the following process.
Journaling can help you identify and challenge that critical inner voice.
Summary
Intimacy describes a sense of closeness in personal relationships.
There are five types of intimacy; emotional, physical, intellectual, experiential, and spiritual.
Intimacy is built through communication, quality time, and building trust.
While many people use sex and intimacy interchangeably, they mean different things.
Sex is only one aspect of physical intimacy.
Problems with intimacy can be due to fears, chronic illness, abuse, and more.
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