Chapman suggests that what makes one person feel valued and loved does not necessarily work for another.
Understanding their partner’s preferred love language can help couples manage their differences and cope with conflict.
Read on to learn how to determine your love language and how it may help your relationship.
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However, there is some research on the subject.
When Love Languages Don’t Match
Partners don’t need to have the same primary love language.
Limitations
Research on the five love languages also has several limitations.
Most of the research has been conducted on heterosexual couples.
What Are the 5 Love Languages?
Understanding your partner’s top or primary love language is the first step in meeting their needs.
A simple, inexpensive, but thoughtful item means more to them than a generic luxury item.
This allows them to explore their interests more and work on personal development.
Rather than losing their individuality, they become moreintimatewith each other while helping their partner reach their potential.
Showing love using their partner’s love language is more likely to have a positive effect.
If so, Chapman says that’s likely their primary love language.
There are limitations to the model, includingheteronormativity, cultural bias, and simplicity.
The five love languages should be viewed as a tool to strengthen relationships more than as a sole resource.
None of these are included in Chapman’s theory.
They can be used to strengthen parent-child relationships.
Chapman has a book on how to use the five love languages with children.
U.S. Department of Health and Human Service.Applying The 5 Love LanguagesTM to healthy relationships.
University of Arizona.The psychology behind the 5 love languages.
5 Love Languages.Frequently asked questions.
Surijah EA, Kirana CT.Five love languages scale factor analysis.Makara Hubs-Asia.
2020;24(1):56. doi:10.7454/hubs.asia.2201118
