Thedeath of a childis tragic.
It is natural for friends of grieving parents to want to help yet struggle to find the right words.
What you sayand what you dont saycan affect someone in need.
Illustration by Zoe Hansen for Verywell Health
This article will discuss ways to talk to someone who has lost a child.
It will also provide suggestions on what to say and what not to say to grieving parents.
They want permission to grieve in their own way.
Grieving parents, at times, need to feel like their childs short life was impactful.
They want to know their child meant something to others who knew and loved them.
Simply express your condolences and offer support in a way that feels fitting.
Here are examples:
What Do You Write in a Text to Someone Who Lost a Child?
Text messages can be simple and short, but they should still be genuine.
Its best to avoid generic messages like, Im sorry for your loss.
Sympathy cards can be as long or as short as you would like them to be.
In either case, venture to keep your message personal.
If you dont have memories of the deceased child, dont fill the space with impersonal fluff.
Simply let the grieving parent know you are thinking of them and share the grief of their loss.
As a general rule, avoid talking about meaning or trying to make things better.
Accept the fact that you may feel awkward and helpless.
Some people cope with grief by keeping busy.
Take care to offer your help, but never force a grieving person to accept it.
The best way to support someone is to offer sincere condolence and open-ended support.
What you dont say can be just as important as what you do say.
Dont attempt to make sense of the childs death or intellectualize it.
No one gets over the death of a child.
The best it’s possible for you to do issupport the grievingparent while they adjust to their loss.
2016;16(1):204. doi:10.1186/s12887-016-0749-9
